"I do"

At the wedding I referenced in "A roll to remember", I talked about singing a song. That wasn't the only time I had sung that song. I sang it at another wedding as well earlier this year. It was a contrast that was amazing between the two. The song I sang was a song about describing a home through the lenses of faith, hope, and love.

The wedding I sang it at, earlier this year, the two were very young. Like all of us who have said "I do", we don't have a clue what we are saying. Making the promise creates a glue so that when we encounter struggles we can fall back on what we have promised. "For better or worse, in sickness and in health" are just words. Very few understand the implication of those words.

At this wedding, my friend was very sick. She may not make it. The words "for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live" were jarring to listen to. I can only imagine what was going through my friend and her husband's minds while repeating those vows. I'm sure those words are much more real to them today than they were when they originally uttered them.

Due to the impromtu nature of the ceremony, my solo was overlooked. The procession was heading to the food table when someone stopped the party and reminded the bride that I was to sing. She stopped her forward movement and said matter-of-factly, "I will sit right here, Jim, you sing." So I sang.

As I sang I looked into the eyes of the couple. I saw weariness and pain, but I also saw resolve and a deep understanding of what had taken place this day. And I saw love. Real love. Love that only comes from deep suffering.

At the end of the song the bride did something that I will long cherish being a witness to. She reached up for her husband, pulled him down to her and kissed him, fiercly whispering "I love you". The power of that one act and the meaning behind it will stay with me forever.

No matter how much love one feels for another, when the words "I do" are uttered without the full understanding behind it, it lacks the power of the one who says it, and sees...really sees.